I look out my window and all I see,
Is depression staring back at me.
The rain hits hard down on the soft earth,
And flowing tracks begin to take birth.
The tracks remind me of those in my own cheeks,
Made by tears- crying for weeks.
When i think of us,
What we used to be,
My eyes start to blurr.
I cannot see.
For the tears have once again found their track.
Happy feeling, I seem to lack.
And all I want to do is get our glorious friendship back.
We lost our grip.
We lost our touch.
I just want to say that I love you so much!
Hear me when I say this now!
I'm sorry if i hurt you though i don't even know how.
I want you back, my dearest friend.
I want our friendship to TRULY mend.
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Comments
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I spread like a disease...
that is SOOO sad. but i love it, the whole thing rhymes and its just really beautiful. ^_^
did you lose a friend recently? or are you just putting yourself in someone's shoes? (you dont hafta tell me if you think im being nosey)
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RawR!
ph34r m3h r4p!d f4ng!R| p0w4hs!!!
~AnimeFansClub rules. XD
(\__/)
(+'.'+) This is Bunny. Copy and paste bunny into your
(")_(") signature to help him conquer the world
Thanks once again
...you have a lot of potential. i think you'll really come into your own given enough time and practice...
...my only suggestion is this: try straying from convention. use different rhyme schemes, different meter. maybe try modeling after a poet you admire. write a sonnet, or anything that will require you to try something new, and you'll see your talent grow by leaps and bounds - eventually you'll have a distinctive style that no one else is using...
...best of luck to you...
Okay I'll have a shot at what u suggest
~ash0045
When i think of us,
What we used to be,
My eyes start to blurr.
I cannot see.
i like in paticular
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VV3 l)0 vvln^7 vv3 ^^[_]57 83(^[_]53 vv3 (^^/
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